


Snowdrop

by nannea



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Fluff, Gemma is dead in this so..., M/M, sorry about that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-03
Updated: 2015-04-03
Packaged: 2018-03-21 01:37:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3672669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nannea/pseuds/nannea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary: Niall works at a cemetery and one day, he notices a curly haired boy, visiting someone's grave.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Snowdrop

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Wattpad.

 

A curly haired boy is sitting in wet grass, gentle wind ruffling his hair. In a fast movement, he tucks his hair behind his ears, continuing to stare in front of him, his eyes glossy from tears.

"Hi Gemma," he whispers.

"It's me again, Harry."

He pulls a lighter out of his jacket pocket, lighting a small candle he has brought. He carefully places it next to the gravestone, the gold letters, which form her name, getting wobbly as tears fill his eyes. He desperately tries to flutter the tears away, soon covering his face and taking in a few deep, calming breaths.

 

It's not the first time he is visiting his sister's grave and there is no need to cry and yet, Harry cries. He cries almost every time he visits. Nowadays it's every Sunday afternoon when he comes to sit on his sister's grave, talking to her for a while.

He always remembers to bring a candle, too. Gemma never cared for flowers but she loved candles and even though it might be stupid, Harry still buys her favourite candles, vanilla scented ones. Their mother thinks it goes to waste, Harry bringing expensive scented candles to the cemetery, but he thinks it's nice. He knows Gemma would love it.

"I don't have much to tell you today," Harry mumbles, suspiciously looking around him to make sure there are no people nearby. Otherwise, he wouldn't be able to talk to Gemma like he wants to.

"School was boring this week and I was sick so I didn't go there on Monday and Tuesday."

He continues talking with a quiet tone, explaining about his week. It never feels strange, talking to Gemma like this, instead it feels comforting. Sometimes when Harry visits, he sits in the grave for an hour and just talks, and it helps, he has reasoned.

It helps with the pain he is feeling, with all the emotions he has hidden inside of him, keeping them from others. He doesn't want to appear as broken, he has to stay strong so he keeps it to himself. The only place where he can show it, share the pain, is at the cemetery.

It's been six months since Gemma passed away. She was sick, fighting cancer. Harry even gave her a bone marrow transplant but nothing helped. She was diagnosed with leukemia when they were both still young and Gemma fought the disease for almost five years before it won.

Harry wasn't sad when it happened, it took some time until the pain came. He was expecting it, knowing she was going to die and it took two weeks to hit him. One day, he woke up, finally realising she was gone and his world broke down.

"I think it gets better in time Gem," Harry explains his thoughts.

"I'm not that sad anymore. Just sometimes when I really, really miss you," he sighs, wiping a lonely teardrop away from his cheek.

 

 

 

\- -

 

On the other side of the cemetery, a blond Irish boy is having a typical working day.

He is whistling happily along the music he is listening from his iPod, sweeping some fallen leaves away from a grave with his broom.

Niall has been working in the cemetery for a month now. He comes there in the weekends to do some gardening and keeping everything clean. He picks up trash, takes care of the graves and cuts the grass. It's not exactly his dream job and being around all the graves makes him a bit miserable sometimes, but he needs the money. It was the best job he could get, seeing as he is an university student, still working on getting his degree.

Niall continues sweeping some leaves, still whistling, but stopping when he notices someone close by to him. In front of a grave is sitting a boy around his age, looking deep in thought. Niall can only see a small piece of his face, the boy's curly brown hair covering most of his features.

It's not the first time he has seen the boy around. For the past month Niall has been working in the cemetery, he has seen the boy visiting the same grave every Sunday afternoon. Niall has never paid that much attention before but now, something catches his interest and he stares at the boy, wondering who he is.

Niall also wonders who the boy is visiting, he always wonders the same when he sees people in the cemetery. He continues to look at the boy for a while longer before deciding to back away, wanting to give the boy some peace.

He focuses on his music, whistling along his current favourite song. Embarrassingly enough, it is Taylor Swift's Blank Space. He hums as he sweeps some leaves away, bending over to pick up some weed from a grave, putting it in his wheelbarrow.

He almost jumps when he feels a pat on his shoulder, letting out a sound, awfully like a squeal. He turns around, pulling his left headphone off. He is met by the curly haired boy who was sitting at the grave earlier, now standing right in front of Niall's eyes.

"Sorry if I scared you," the curly haired boy mumbles, avoiding to make an eye-contact.

"That's fine," Niall is quick to tell him, now curious to know what the boy wants.

"You work here, right?"

"Yes," Niall immediately answers.

"I uh, I was wondering," the boy starts but cuts himself off, swaying from one heel to another.

"I want to, maybe like, plant something to a grave but I eh, I don't know anything about plants so I was, kind of hoping..."

His little speech sounds awkward and Niall feels bad for him. He hopes the boy would have more confidence and he would at least make an eye-contact instead of staring at the ground. Niall looks at him curiously before deciding to help him out.

"Do you need my advice?"

"Yeah, if that's alright," the boy murmurs.

"Sure, well, let's see," Niall starts thinking.

"It's getting a bit colder now so I wouldn't recommend anything like tulips or violets. I reckon snowdrops would look nice, or maybe sweet box," Niall wonders out loud, keeping his eyes on the curly haired boy's face.

"Sweet what?" The curly haired boy finally raises his head, looking into Niall's eyes.

His eyes look a bit glossy and red, from crying Niall guesses. He focuses on the colour, thinking it is quite interesting. The boy's eyes are forest green, more warm toned than cold. Since they are standing quite far apart, Niall can't tell much else. He finds himself thinking the boy's eyes look beautiful, as does his face, but Niall has always had a soft spot for pretty eyes.

"Follow me, I'll show you," Niall decides to say. He knows exactly where he can find some snowdrops and sweet boxes to show the boy.

"This one here is sweet box," Niall points at a plant next to a grave, crouching down and motioning the boy to follow.

"They last winter season quite well," Niall explains and the boy nods.

"And over here," Niall continues, getting up and walking to another grave.

"We have snowdrop," he points at white flowers, showing them to the boy.

"It's actually my favourite flower," Niall reveals.

"I like those. Where could I get them?" The boy hesitantly asks, careful at forming his sentence.

"I reckon any flower store sells them this time of the year. They are not expensive at all and easy to plant as well," Niall answers. He moves his eyes on the boy's face, shamelessly looking at his features.

"O-Okay, well, thank you," the boy struggles with his words.

"No problem. I'm working here next weekend if you need help with planting. I could do it for you," Niall finds himself offering.

"Yeah, that would be eh, nice," the boy mumbles, looking into Niall's eyes before moving his gaze back on the ground.

"If you come same time next Sunday, I'll be here somewhere," Niall says. He is starting to feel a bit uncomfortable, the stranger's awkwardness beginning to affect him.

"Okay well, see you, umm," the boy stops there, raising his head and looking at Niall, knitting his eyebrows a bit.

"Niall," Niall finishes.

"Harry." The curly haired boy, Harry, offers him a shy smile which Niall returns. He nods at the boy and watches him turning around, walking away.

Niall sighs, looking after the boy, Harry, until he is just a tiny spot in the horizon far away. He sighs again, walking back to his wheelbarrow and continuing his day.

 

 

\- -

 

The next Sunday, Niall anxiously waits for the curly haired boy, Harry, to show up.

He remembers it was around noon when they met last Sunday and now, it's already getting late but Harry is nowhere to be seen. Niall has been waiting, and waiting, even scared of listening to music in case Harry would call him from afar.

He sighs to himself, wondering why he cares so much. He reasons there was something about Harry, something sad and broken that made him want to help out, even if it's just planting snowdrops.

Niall still wonders who Harry was visiting, whose grave made him so vulnerable, so broken-like. He recalls the puffy and red eyes, glossy from crying. He knows it must be someone important and throughout the weekend, he has been wanting to check the grave Harry was sitting in front of. He hasn't done it though, thinking it's private and none of his business, anyway.

 

It's almost time for Niall to go home, he has been done for the day for almost thirty minutes but has to stay until three. He knows there isn't exactly anyone watching him so technically, he could leave early.

He is responsible for the weekend shifts because the full-time worker has time off, and he is working alone, but he still wants to do his hours honorably. Besides, there is a church right next to the cemetery and he is sure one of the priests keeps a secret eye on him to make sure he is in fact working.

Niall is caught up with watering some plants when Harry arrives. Harry immediately sees Niall, crouched down next to a grave and watering plants. Harry feels nervous as he walks closer, carrying two paper bags, filled with plants for Gemma's grave. He got money from his mother, not that he needed it, but his mother insisted on paying for the plants. She also told Harry he is a sweetheart for always looking after Gemma's grave.

"H-Hello," Harry stutters after stopping quite close to Niall but still, keeping a safe distance between them.

"Oh hi, Harry." Niall turns his head, immediately getting up and smiling.

"I eh, I got the plants," Harry continues his awkward way of speaking.

"Did you buy snowdrops?" Niall asks, his eyes landing on Harry's, causing him to stare at the ground.

"Yeah, I got eight of them."

"Eight?" Niall asks, hints of laughter in his question.

"Y-Yeah," Harry stutters a bit.

"Can you wait here? I'll go get some tools," Niall asks and Harry nods, watching Niall walking towards an old shed. Harry guesses it's where all the gardening tools are and he waits at his spot, looking over to where Gemma's grave is.

He is nervous for taking Niall there, but he needs the help. Harry has never planted anything in his life and he doesn't know how, and that is why he accepted Niall's help in the first place. He has never been to Gemma's grave with anyone besides their mother, and the idea of taking someone there is mortifying. He tries not to think about it, reasoning he doesn't need to tell Niall anything.

 _Niall is just a cemetery worker, maybe a gardener,_  Harry thinks to himself. There is no need to bring Gemma up or explain who she is, or what happened to her. Harry reasons Niall wouldn't ask, not directly at least. He must interact with people who come to the cemetery and he should know how to behave with them. Harry hopes Niall knows better than to ask questions about a touchy subject no one wants to talk about.

"Hi," Niall's voice fills the air and Harry looks up from the ground, glancing at the boy before turning his eyes away again.

"Lead the way," Niall says, his voice sounding happy. Harry gulps, starting to walk towards Gemma's grave, his chest tightening and heart beating faster. He tries to clear his throat, desperately thinking of something to say but not coming up with anything good enough.

After a short walk, he finally reaches the grave. It looks exactly the same than last week he visited, the candle he brought is still there, only halfway burned but flamed out. He places the paper bags on the ground, looking at Niall.

"So eight plants. Where do you want them?" Niall asks, getting one of the plants out of the bag and examining it, thinking Harry has managed to select just the right kind of plant. The flower hasn't opened just yet, and Niall thinks they will last for a longer while if he takes care of them.

"I uh, I don't know," Harry says, crouching down and trying to balance his weight.

"Maybe like this," Niall places the plant on the ground. He gets the rest three out of the bag and places them on a row, showing Harry one possible option.

"We could put them like this on either side," he explains and Harry nods.

"Yeah, that looks cool," Harry breaths out.

"Alright, I'll show you what to do," Niall says and hands over a small shovel.

Niall begins to teach Harry, explaining what to do as he plants the first snowdrop next to the grave. Harry follows him, digging a hole directly opposite of the plant Niall put on the ground. Harry reasons it's simple enough and next time, he is able to do this by himself.

They both stay quiet, Niall secretly taking quick looks at the curly haired boy. He notices all kinds of things, like how Harry's jeans are ripped from the knees and how his Converse look worn-out and dirty. His curls look straggly and ruffled, like Harry hasn't had time to brush them. He is wearing a warm-looking jumper, his whole outfit black apart from his dirty-white trainers.

"Can I ask you something?" Niall decides to break the silence after planting three snowdrops, grabbing the last one.

"Yeah," Harry hesitantly answers, completely focused on the planting.

"Your sister?" Niall carefully guesses, Harry raising his head and looking at Niall. Niall tilts his head towards the gravestone and Harry understands it, nodding his head the tiniest bit.

"How did you know?" He questions and focuses back on digging the ground to create a hole for the plant.

"It's easy to tell who people visit," Niall tries to explain, wondering if he is making any sense.

"How?" Harry simply asks.

"Well, from what people bring to the graves, how often they come, how old they are, you know," Niall lists.

"Oh," Harry only breaths out.

"Yeah it's eh, it's hard to explain," Niall says as he finishes planting the last flower. Looking at the row of flowers, he thinks they look perfect.

"They look nice," Harry makes a comment, getting Niall's attention immediately.

"Yeah, they do. I love snowdrops," Niall tells him.

They keep looking at each other for a while, a small blush forming on Harry's cheek and he finally turns his eyes away. He doesn't know what to do now, he wants to be alone and talk to Gemma, but he doesn't know how to tell that to Niall.

"I eh, I'll go then, I guess," Niall finally breaks the silence, getting up and grabbing his tools.

"Yeah eh, thanks for you know, helping me out," Harry gets up too, collecting the empty paper bags.

"I can take those if you want," Niall points at the bags and Harry gratefully nods, handing them over.

Niall sighs a bit, looking at the ground before walking away, feeling surprisingly upset. He doesn't know what it is, but he was hoping to get something out of the situation. Something, anything.

He definitely didn't expect it to feel awkward. He usually isn't like this, but Harry's awkwardness seems almost contagious and he barely got a word out of his mouth.  _How embarrassing,_ Niall thinks.

"Hey Niall, wait up!" He hears someone calling him and he turns around, watching Harry jogging to him.

"Will you -," Harry pants a bit.

"Will you like, be here, you know next Sunday?" He asks, hesitantly meeting Niall's blue eyes.

"Yeah, I work here every weekend," Niall reveals.

"I'll – I – See you then," Harry finally manages to get out, blushing at his own silly behaviour.

"See you," Niall says. A small smile grows on his face as he watches Harry walking back to the grave, thinking Harry's awkwardness is after all, quite cute.

 

 

\- -

 

"I met someone," Harry mumbles, hesitantly looking at his roommate to see his reaction.

"You met someone?" Liam asks, eyes still focused on his laptop screen.

"His name is Niall," Harry sighs, almost dreamily.

"Oh?"

"He has an Irish accent and he is really, really hot. He is short, not too short but you know like cute short and his hair is like -"  
  
"Where did you meet him then?" Liam interrupts, finally showing some interest towards his roommate.

"Oh, about that," Harry blushes.

"At the cemetery."  
  
"Come again?" Liam sounds shocked.

"He works there."  
  
"You met someone. At the cemetery."

"Yeah," Harry's blush deepens, his cheeks feeling like they're burning.

"Are you going to see him again then?" Liam asks, focusing back on his laptop.

"Suppose so, he's there every weekend."  
  
"You should ask him out if you like him."

"Maybe," Harry mumbles, blush still heavy on his cheeks.

He doesn't really understand why he saw the need to tell his roommate about Niall. Surely they are close but Liam is straight and has never really shown any interest towards Harry's love life. Not that he even has one,  _but still_.

They never talk about these things but Harry really wanted to tell someone. He wanted to explain how gorgeous Niall is, how generous he seems. He wanted to talk about the blonde highlights in his hair, his brown roots, thick accent. His freckles, nose, pale skin, ears, everything.

He sighs a bit, taking a look at his roommate who is completely lost on studying. Harry reasons he selected the wrong time, seeing as Liam is really busy. He decides to drop it, thinking maybe he could try again some other day.

 

 

_\- -_

 

The week passes by fast and on Saturday, Niall is working his six hour shift just like always. He is listening to music, swaying his hips a bit as he sweeps leaves away, collecting them to his wheelbarrow.

He curses all the trees and autumn weather, causing leaves to fly everywhere and putting him to work even harder. There is so much cleaning to do and Niall tries to be fast, although he doesn't need to rush but he wants to get the work done.

There are surprisingly many people in the cemetery and Niall tries his best to stay out of people's way. He knows it's not respectful to hover around the graves and collect leaves when people are visiting their loved ones.

Niall is deep in thought when someone taps his shoulder, causing him to let out a small squeal, almost jumping around. His eyes are widened and he stares at the person for a while before realising who it is, blushing at his own embarrassing behaviour.

"Hi," Harry breaths out, a small smile on his face.

"Hi!" Niall feels surprised, having no clue what Harry is doing in the cemetery since it's only Saturday.

"I eh, I decided to visit today," Harry speaks up as if he was reading Niall's thoughts.

"How – How are you?" Niall carefully asks, not knowing what else he could say.

"I'm fine, and you?" Harry sounds polite.

"Good, busy with cleaning all the leaves away," Niall explains. He motions around him with his hand, pointing at all the red and yellow leaves on the ground.

"Why do you clean them away? I think they look nice," Harry comments.

"It's part of my job," Niall shrugs his shoulders.

"Do you like working here?" 

"Well, the money is much needed but," Niall cuts himself off.

"Isn't it miserable?"

"It is," Niall admits, nodding his head a bit.

"So," Harry breaths out.

"So," Niall mimics him.

"I'll go now, to uh, to the grave," Harry starts feeling awkward again, stuttering in his words.

"Yeah," Niall offers him a small smile which Harry tries to return but fails, his smile ending up looking sad. He turns around, walking away, leaving Niall standing alone and feeling a bit confused as he looks at the curly haired boy go.

 

 

Niall tries continuing his work but he is awfully aware of Harry's presence. Of course, Harry isn't anywhere near him but Niall can still see him from where he is standing, watering some plants. Harry is sitting in front of the grave, staring at the grave stone.

Niall's heart skips a beat when he sees Harry hiding his face under his palms. The sight is so sad, and Niall feels upset, stopping everything he is doing to stare at the sight of Harry. He wonders if he should go over, knowing he shouldn't do anything like that.

 _Harry is a complete stranger_ , Niall tries to talk to himself as he takes small steps towards Harry.

 _You can't go and comfort him_ , Niall continues his silent talk.

 _Don't do it,_  he yells inside of his head when he is about to reach Harry.

 _You're an idiot,_  he finishes his silent talk as he crouches down next to Harry. He hesitates before bringing his hand on Harry's shoulder.

To his surprise, Harry doesn't even flinch under his touch. He is still sitting, his knees to his chest, head pressed down, arms wrapped around his legs. It's upsetting, seeing someone like that and Niall wishes he would know the right thing to say, but he doesn't. Instead of saying something, he moves his hand and rubs Harry's upper back a bit, thinking it should be comforting.

It feels odd and unfamiliar, trying to comfort a stranger. Niall doesn't know a thing about Harry, not even how old he is but for some reason, he wants to be there. He often feels like that when he sees people crying, especially older people visiting their spouses. It's heartbreaking, witnessing something like that and Niall often wishes he could help out in some way.

"Are you okay?" Niall asks, tone gentle, realising too late how stupid his question is. Of course Harry is not okay, he is crying at his sister's grave so he most definitely isn't okay.

"Why are you -," Niall hears Harry croaking.

"Why did you come?" Harry manages to ask the question and Niall immediately drops his hand, standing up.

"I'm sorry," he is fast to apologise, ready to leave Harry alone, mentally cursing himself.

"N-No," Harry stutters a bit, looking up at Niall and grabbing his hand to stop him from moving.

"It's okay, I just," Harry tries to say, his cheeks wet from tears, eyes looking tired. He lets go of Niall's hand, keeping the eye-contact for a while longer.

Niall hesitantly sits down next to him, thinking it's quite odd to sit on the cold ground but he decides not to mind for the sake of Harry. Niall keeps quiet, still silently cursing himself. He keeps wondering what on earth he was thinking when he walked over and decided to try and comfort the curly haired boy.

They sit in silence for a while, Harry staring into nowhere, feeling tired from his earlier crying. He sighs a bit before leaning towards Niall, searching for some sort of comfort. He isn't exactly thinking when he rests his head on Niall's shoulder, continuing to stare into nowhere.

"I bring her scented candles," Harry breaks the silence.

"It's ridiculous, I know, but she liked those candles," he continues talking, his voice raspy from the crying.

"It's a nice thought," Niall says.

"Gemma had leukemia."

"I'm sorry," Niall gently says, trying to peek at Harry whose head is still on his shoulder.

"It's been six months. Does it ever get better?"

"I'm sure it does, in time," Niall whispers, not knowing the right answer to Harry's question.

"Everyone says it does, but it doesn't always feel like that."

"It must be hard."

"It is," Harry sighs, finally sitting up properly. He takes Niall off guard when he hides his face again, going back to his earlier position. His arms are tightly wrapped around his legs, body shivering the slightest.

"I'm sorry," Niall hears Harry whimpering a bit.

"About what?"

"I'm a mess. You don't even know me."

"Doesn't matter, don't worry about it," Niall gently says, patting Harry's shoulder a bit.

"I eh, I was wondering," Niall continues, feeling a bit nervous for what he is about to say.

"Would you like to have coffees with me?"

"When? Like, now?" He hears Harry asking, still hiding his face.

"Well, yeah. My shift ends in twenty minutes."

"I'd like that," Harry surprises Niall, raising his head and taking a quick look at the blond boy.

"Yeah?" Niall makes sure and Harry nods a bit.

"I can, I can just stay here until you've," Harry tries to say and Niall nods a bit, understanding it.

"I'll come back when I'm done," Niall promises, smiling gently at Harry before getting up.

 

\--

 

The next twenty minutes, Niall spends thinking about Harry. He wonders how old the boy is and why exactly he asked Harry out for coffees. He made the decision in the heat of the moment, it wasn't planned, it was simply something he thought of for a second before blurting it out.

It feels strange, going out for coffees with a stranger. Harry doesn't feel like a stranger though, Niall thinks. He thinks he wants to get to know the boy better, curious about his life and background, wondering how much he will find out.

He felt surprised that Harry talked about his sister, but Niall thinks it must be easier opening up to a stranger than to a loved one. Niall himself never knows how to talk to his friends or parents, it feels awkward, so he reasons maybe Harry feels the same way.

Niall looks at his phone, noticing it's time to take his tools away. He then takes a quick look towards where Gemma's grave is, seeing Harry sitting on the ground.

Harry looks so small and vulnerable, sitting there by himself. Niall feels a pinch in his heart, confused by why he feels so strongly towards the curly haired boy.

"Hi," Niall breaths out after stepping close to Harry, ready to go.

"Hi. You ready?" Harry looks up, his eyes still looking tired and puffy from crying.

"Yeah," Niall nods a bit.

"Do you have a car?" Harry asks and Niall quickly shakes his head because no, he doesn't even have his licence yet although he is already twenty.

"Me neither," Harry reveals.

"Where do you want to go?" Niall asks after they have stepped outside the cemetery, Niall closing a small gate behind them.

"I eh, I don't know this area well," Harry tells and takes a quick look at Niall.

"There's one bakery nearby, we could go there," Niall suggests and Harry nods.

They end up walking in silence for a while, neither of them really knowing what to say. Niall starts regretting his decision to ask Harry to have coffees, suddenly it feels like the worst idea he has ever had. It's uncomfortable and awkward, and not something Niall has ever experienced before.

"This is awkward," Harry suddenly blurts out.

Niall immediately turns to look at him, his eyes widening a bit before he bursts out a laugh. He feels both relieved and nervous at the same time, and also genuinely glad Harry blurted it out.

"Yeah, it really is," Niall chuckles a bit.

"Why did you, you know, ask me?" Harry questions.

"I don't know," Niall truthfully tells.

"I just thought you looked like you needed it," he then adds something that is true, too. He thought about it, Harry looking like he needed company, sitting at his sister's grave and looking so lonely and broken.

"I did," Harry mumbles a bit.

"How old are you?" Niall decides to ask and Harry tells he is turning twenty on February. From there on, they start asking questions, slowly learning new things about each other as they are walking to the bakery.

Niall soon knows that Harry studies to become a nurse, he has just started his second year and lives across the town in a campus area. Niall told Harry about his school, he is in his third year now, majoring in biology.

"Hello, what can I get you?" A worker asks once they have stepped inside the small bakery which is quiet, only a few customers around.

"I'll have latte and one of those muffins," Niall points at his favourite muffin, white chocolate one. He comes to the bakery almost every weekend after his shift and gets a latte and the same muffin, eating it by himself. He thinks it's a nice change, having someone with him and not having to be alone.

Harry orders tea and after some thinking, ends up getting the same muffin Niall did. They wait until their drinks are ready and Niall leads them to a quiet table in the corner of the bakery, smiling shyly at Harry after they have both sat down.

"Why do you want to be a nurse?" Niall asks, sipping his coffee before taking a bite of his muffin, wanting to moan at how good it tastes.

"I don't know, I just want to help people," Harry truthfully tells.

"Why biology?" He asks his own question.

"I didn't know what else I wanted to study," Niall chuckles a bit. It causes Harry to smile and Niall immediately notices a small dimple forming on Harry's cheek.

They continue talking, keeping it casual. They talk about music and school, their friends, favourite TV-shows and hobbies. Harry swims to keep himself in shape, Niall is too lazy and likes to just go out with his friends. Harry likes reading, Niall enjoys watching action movies from Netflix.

Niall soon realises he already knows quite a bit about Harry, and can tell what type of person Harry is. He definitely likes staying at home, doesn't care about partying, is more quiet and shy than a people person. Harry seems caring and kind, and he is definitely a deep thinker.

Harry on the other hand, thinks Niall seems outgoing and isn't that shy. He spends a lot of time with his friends, something Harry doesn't do so much himself. He more enjoys staying in, reading books or hanging out with his best friend, whom he shares a door room with.

Once they are both done with their drinks, nothing left of the muffins either, they sit in a silence for a while. Unlike earlier, it doesn't feel awkward anymore, instead they both find themselves appreciating the silence.

"I should go soon," Harry is the one breaking the silence.

"Are you taking the bus?" Niall asks and Harry nods.

"I can walk you to the bus stop," Niall offers and gets another nod from Harry.

"You don't have to, though," Harry realises, offering another option to Niall who quickly shakes his head.

"I live in that direction anyway," he explains.

 

Five minutes later, they are standing at the bus stop side by side, waiting for Harry's bus to arrive. Harry keeps thinking he should say something, soon enough he'll be on his way back home and before he leaves, he has to say something.

"Harry?" Niall is the one breaking the silence.

"Next weekend," Harry breaths out, blushing before clearing his throat.

"I mean, I'm coming here again next weekend. Sunday, like normally. So I thought -," Harry cuts himself off, panicking when he notices his bus is arriving, realising the time is up.

"I'll be here," Niall says, offering Harry a smile.

"Come find me!" He shouts as Harry steps on the bus, waving his hand before the door closes. Then Niall is left alone, standing at the empty bus stop.

 

 

\- -

 

"Did you see Niall again?" Liam asks when Harry gets back to their shared dorm room.

Harry is surprised Liam is even there, normally he is gone most of the weekend. Liam has tests coming up though, so Harry reasons he must be studying for them.

"Yeah," Harry smiles, laying down on his bed.

"We even had coffees, he asked me."

"So you like him then, huh?" Liam teases, sitting down on his own bed across the small room.

"He seems great," Harry's tone is soft now.

"Did you get his number?"

"I couldn't ask," Harry sighs.

"Next time then," Liam sounds encouraging.

"I think it'd do some good for you, you know being with someone," he continues.

"Maybe," Harry simply answers.

"Not maybe, definitely."

"Okay," Harry now chuckles.

"Do you want to go out for pints tonight?" Liam surprises Harry with his question.

"Sure," Harry finds himself saying.

He rarely goes out but he reasons he can make exceptions. It's not often that he hangs out with Liam, the only time they're together is when they're both at their room.

Harry doesn't get drunk that night, only having two pints. He has fun though and even sings karaoke with Liam, who is drunk and keeps laughing at everything.

Despite of having fun, from time to time Harry's thoughts slip to Niall. He keeps wondering what the other boy is doing, where he is, if he is having fun, too. He keeps sighing to himself as he wishes he would have Niall's number.

 

 

\- -

 

During the week, Harry keeps stressing about Niall.

He is scared Niall won't be there on Sunday and he keeps cursing himself for not asking Niall's number. He wonders what would happen if Niall wasn't there, at the cemetery, on Sunday. He doesn't have a way to contact Niall and it's scary, so scary he feels like pulling his hair out, one by one.

Luckily, Liam is there to keep him sane. Liam, who keeps encouraging Niall will be there, of course he will, it's his workplace after all. Thanks to Liam, Harry stops worrying so much and by Friday, he is more excited than scared of Sunday.

On Saturday morning, Harry finds himself counting the time until he'll see Niall again.

It starts with 23 hours and by the time he goes to bed, it's only 12 hours. He is beyond excited and can't wait to see the Irish boy again.

 

 

\- -

 

On Sunday, Niall is already waiting for Harry when he finally shows up. Harry is wearing a ridiculous looking hat, boots, skinny jeans and an over-sized jumper. Unlike the other times, he is smiling when he reaches Niall.

They talk for a while, walking around the cemetery, Harry blabbering a bit as Niall tries to get some work done. Almost right from the start, it doesn't feel awkward. It only does when Harry says he should go to Gemma's grave and Niall doesn't know how to react.

He waves Harry bye, watching him walking away, shoulders and head pressed down. He thinks how ridiculous Harry looks in his boots and a huge hat but then again, Niall reasons it suits Harry.

He continues working, from time to time ending up staring at where Harry is, crouched down next to his sister's grave. He sees Harry lighting a candle, smiling to himself when he remembers what Harry told about the candles.

Niall doesn't expect Harry to come back anytime soon and he feels confused when half an hour later, he notices Harry walking to him. He waves a bit, stopping sweeping leaves and waiting for Harry to reach him.

"Hi," Harry breaths out.

"Hi," Niall answers, smiling a bit.

"When are you getting off?" Harry asks, surprising himself by how casual he sounds.

"Thirty minutes," Niall gives an answer after checking the time.

"Are you busy?" Harry asks another question, Niall's smile growing wider when he realises what it must mean.

"Yes I can join you for a coffee," Niall bluntly says, causing Harry to chuckle a bit.

"I'll go back there until you're done," Harry decides, blindly pointing at behind him, trying to point at Gemma's grave. Niall nods, focusing back on his work but still, finding himself occationally looking at Harry.

 

 

\- -

 

From there on, Harry continues visiting the cemetery every Sunday.

On each Sunday, he goes to find Niall first. They exchange a few words, sometimes walk around a bit, Niall working as they talk.

When Harry goes to Gemma's grave, Niall gives him the space and peace he needs, moving to work further away. Harry takes his time, sometimes staying at the grave for an hour before finding Niall again so they can go to the bakery.

It becomes their thing, something they do every Sunday afternoon. Sometimes, they end up sitting in the small bakery for hours, just talking about their lives and sharing their thoughts.

A few times, Harry is feeling a bit upset and Niall tries to cheer him up. He always feels like an Olympian when Harry laughs, the beautiful sound melting Niall's heart.

Towards Christmas, they still do their Sunday meetings. They text during the weeks but they never have time to meet, both of them being surprisingly busy and living on the opposite sides of the city doesn't help, either. During the weeks, Niall's thoughts always slip back on Harry as he keeps hoping they could meet more often.

 

 

\- -

 

When Sunday comes around again, Niall is excited, happy to see Harry. He isn't thrilled about going to work and having to clean off leaves but then again, he is excited to see Harry.

He walks to work, listening to music and wanting to jump up and down, his mood happier than it has been in ages. He opens the cemetery gate, closing it and making his way towards the shed to get his tools. He is just about to open the shed door when his phone buzzes and he pulls it out, smiling when he notices it's Harry.

 _I want to do something today_ , Harry's message says. Niall answers with just a question mark, waiting for Harry's reply.

 _I'll come a bit late. See you then .x_  Harry answers. Niall knits his brows, wondering what Harry wants to do but deciding he can just wait until Harry comes around.

 

 

\- -

 

When Harry finally shows up, Niall is putting his tools away. Harry immediately spots Niall at the old shed, walking over, feeling a bit nervous. He has been thinking about something, wanting to suggest it but he doesn't have any clue how Niall is going to feel about it. Harry knows it might be weird, a strange thing to ask someone, but it's something that he wants.

"Hi Niall," Harry breaths out once he has reached the shed.

"Hi," Niall peeks from the doorway.

"Hold on a minute," he then says, putting the rest of his tools away before stepping outside, locking the shed door.

"Hi," Niall says again, stepping closer and pulling Harry into a hug.

"So," Harry nervously says.

"I was thinking about something," he continues, staring at the ground instead of making an eye-contact with Niall.

"Could you come visit Gemma with me?" He asks, voice shaky, his nervousness taking a better part of him.

"Of course," Niall immediately answers.

"Really?" Harry looks shocked, his green eyes widening a bit.

"Of course," Niall gently repeats. He reaches to take Harry's hand in his and starts to lead them towards the grave, keeping his hand in Harry's the whole time.

Niall stays quiet as they reach the grave, watching Harry crouching down and pulling something out of his pocket. Niall smiles when he notices it's the same candle as always, watching Harry lighting it and placing it right next to the gravestone.

"Hi Gemma," Harry's tone is soft and for a moment he forgets Niall is there, standing right next to him.

"It's me again, Harry," he says.

"I brought someone with me," he continues talking, then realising what he is doing and looking up at Niall.

Niall immediately crouches down, offering Harry a gentle smile, squeezing his shoulder reassuringly. He tries to signal it's alright, that he doesn't mind and Harry smiles back before turning his eyes back on the stone.

"This is Niall. I think you would really like him."

Niall feels his eyes watering, his heart aching to the way Harry is speaking, his tone soft and yet, sad. There is something about his tone that makes him sound broken and when Niall hears the next words coming from Harry, he thinks his heart breaks.

"I wish you'd be here to meet him."

Niall doesn't know what to think and he feels hot tears rolling down his cheeks. He is fast to wipe them away, hoping Harry doesn't notice. He changes his position, sitting down on the cold ground, Harry soon following him.

They are both pressing their legs to their chests, Harry's arms protectively around his legs. Niall takes a quick look at Harry before resting his head on Harry's shoulder.

"You can talk to her, you know. I don't mind," Niall says after Harry has kept quiet for a while.

"I sound crazy," Harry mumbles.

"No, you don't."

And it's all Harry needs to hear, and he starts talking again. He tells Gemma about his week, talking about the things he has done. He talks and talks and talks, and all Niall does is listen in silence, head pressed on Harry's shoulder.

When it starts to sound like Harry is crying, Niall wraps his arm around Harry. He holds Harry, his head still on Harry's shoulder as he listen to Harry talking, the subject now being about his mother.

"Mum says I shouldn't waste my money on the candles anymore," Harry is explaining.

"I lied to her and told her I wouldn't," he then chuckles, Niall bursting out a quiet laugh as well.

"I want to get a candle for my room too," Harry then tells and Niall's laugh dies down as he realises it's serious again.

"And I framed a picture of us, I finally found a good frame for it."

"Do you want to see it?" Harry then asks and Niall realises the question is meant for him.

"Sure," he answers. He sits up properly, watching Harry tapping his phone screen before showing something to Niall.

There are two children in the picture, an older girl and a baby boy. Gemma and Harry. Gemma is holding Harry, grinning happily and missing at least half of her teeth. Harry is wearing a blue onesie, and Niall almost coos at the picture.

"I'm three months old in it, I think," Harry explains before putting his phone away.

"She means a lot to you," Niall makes a comment, keeping his eyes on Harry, looking at his profile.

"She does," Harry simply says.

 

Soon enough, it's getting cold and Harry tells they can leave. Niall asks if they should go to the bakery and Harry agrees, both of them getting up and brushing their clothes clean. Harry says his goodbyes, telling Gemma he loves her. Niall has to swallow down his tears, scared that he is going to cry again.

 

 

\- -

 

Niall spends half of Sunday night thinking about Harry, not able to sleep.

He goes to his phone gallery, looking at the only picture he has of Harry. He watches Harry's features closely, thinking that even though Harry looks sad, he is also beautiful.

He took the picture a while back when they were having their usual coffees at the bakery. Harry tried to protest but finally gave up, letting Niall take a picture of him. He cried earlier and that is why he looks a bit sad in the picture, but Niall doesn't mind.

He feels surprised when his phone buzzes and he goes to his home screen, opening the message app. Harry has sent him a text, asking if he is still up and Niall quickly answers by a simple yes.

 _I can't sleep_ , Harry's reply comes in only a few seconds later.

 _Can I tell you something?_  Niall sends back, a thought crossing his mind. There is something he wants to tell Harry, something he wanted to say earlier in the cemetery but for some reason, he didn't. He reasons now is a good time, after all he wants Harry to know it.

 _Sure_ , Harry answers and Niall begins to type the message, carefully forming his sentence.

 _I wanted to tell you earlier already, but you mean a lot to me,_ Niall sends.

 _You too .x,_  Harry simply answers.

 

 

 - -

 

 _Guess what? I'm sick, caught the flu I think :( ,_  Harry texts Niall early on Tuesday morning when Niall is still in bed, half asleep and trying to get up.

 _Damn, that sucks_ , Niall types in an answer, yawning widely and stretching his arms.

 _Now I'm stuck alone in bed the whole day,_  Harry soon texts back and Niall smirks to himself when an idea crosses his mind.

He decides he likes his idea, sending Harry a text and wishing him to get well soon. He hops into the shower, washing himself as he keeps thinking about his idea, wondering if he should do it.

 _I will_ , he thinks to himself as he his drying his hair.

First, he needs to find out where Harry's university is located exactly. He has never been there before, Harry has been to his place but he has never seen Harry's dorm room. He types in a few things, soon finding the address and looking it up on Google maps.

Next, he checks bus schedules, looking for which bus to take. Once he feels confident that he knows how to get to Harry's school, he begins to think how he is going to find out where Harry's dorm is located.

 _Oh hey, I forgot to ask you something the other day,_  Niall decides to go with a lie. He knows it's bad but he'll make it up to Harry later and besides, he reasons Harry won't be mad, anyway.

 _One of my mates might know you, he said he lives close to your dorm room. His number is 7, and it's the same building than yours,_ he finishes the text.

 _Can't be, I live in building 4 and the numbers start from 20. I'm 24_ , Harry answers and Niall smirks, realising Harry has no clue what is going on.

 _Oh, I have to ask him about that then_ , Niall slyly answers, putting his phone to his back pocket and thinking;  _success._

 

After getting ready, Niall makes his way to the closest bus stop, the one Harry always uses. It doesn't take long for a bus to arrive and Niall hops in, thinking he can't remember the last time he was using a bus.

Usually, he either walks or bikes to where he is going. Since every place he needs to go is close by to each other, he never needs to use a bus. He is a bit nervous, constantly checking his phone to see the notes he wrote down for himself, explaining where he needs to hop off and which bus to take next.

Niall leaves the bus one stop before the actual city centre. He looks around, wondering if he could find a grocery store somewhere. He needs to visit one because he wants to buy something for Harry before going over. When he spots an M&S sign, he feels relieved.

To his luck, the Marks & Spencer store is rather big and he smiles when he spots a candle section. He has no idea what kind of candles Harry buys for Gemma, but he looks for a vanilla scented one, wanting to faint when he notices the price tag.

 _Nine pounds, that's ridiculous,_  Niall huffs to himself before making his way to the grocery part of the store.

 

Twenty minutes later, he leaves the store with two heavy grocery bags filled with things he is bringing to Harry.

He was unsure of what to get because Harry lives in a dorm, and it made things a bit harder. Niall knows Harry has a small microwave and a mini-fridge so he bought some tomato soup, Harry's favourite soda, pudding and some other things he hopes Harry likes.

He waits for the bus which goes right to Harry's school, and three minutes later it arrives. It's a shorter trip than the first one, only taking fifteen minutes to get to the school. He hops off of the bus, looking around and soon spotting a street map of the campus area.

"Building four," Niall mumbles out loud, finally finding it and realising it's the one right across the street.

He feels nervous, walking inside the building and searching for the right dorm. His heart is beating loud in his chest and he gulps. He realises he didn't even make sure Harry is in his dorm but then again, he is sick so where else could he possibly be.

Niall finally finds the right door, hesitating a bit before knocking, anxiously waiting for Harry to open the door.

"Did you forget your keys again because I swear -" Harry's eyes widen as the door flies open, revealing a grinning Niall standing on the other side.

"Niall," Harry breaths out, his mouth forming a shape of an 'o'.

"Hi Harry," Niall happily says.

"W-what?" Harry manages to ask, sniffing a bit and shaking his head.

"Surprise," Niall chuckles a bit, motioning Harry to move aside.

"What are you doing here?" Harry asks and finally steps aside, letting Niall in.

"Ditching school and visiting you," Niall casually says and sits down on one of the beds in the room, thinking it's Harry's.

"That's not mine," Harry comments and Niall blushes a bit, moving to sit on the other bed.

"I brought you something," Niall lifts the bags up, Harry feeling dumbfounded as he stares at Niall.

"What?" Niall asks, raising his eyebrows.

"Nothing, I just," Harry ends up shrugging his shoulders.

"Don't you mind getting sick?" He then asks, still standing in the middle of the room.

"What?" Niall doesn't understand the question.

"You might catch the flu," Harry clarifies.

"Right. No, I don't care," Niall shakes his head a bit.

"Good," Harry comments and steps closer, bending over to take Niall's hands in his, pulling him up. Niall almost crashes on Harry's chest, yelping and wondering what is happening.

Harry keeps Niall's hands in his, staring into Niall's blue eyes. For a moment it feels like time stops but then, Harry leans in, pressing his lips on Niall's.

It takes Niall off guard but he soon reacts, closing his eyes and kissing Harry back. Harry mumbles something against Niall's lips before pecking them in a loving way.

"Huh?" Niall lets out, pulling away the tiniest bit to meet Harry's eyes.

"You're amazing," Harry is smiling, his tone gentle. A smile grows on Niall's face as he keeps staring into Harry's eyes, eventually leaning in to kiss Harry again.

 

After kissing each other for ages, Niall makes Harry some tea and heats the soup he bought in the microwave.

They both sit on Harry's bed, keeping quiet, just enjoying the moment as it is. Niall wonders how it's always so easy being with Harry, how it feels natural. He takes a look at Harry who is finishing his soup, some of it on the corner of his mouth. Niall chuckles, leaning in to brush his thumb on the corner of Harry's mouth, wiping it clean.

"Thanks," Harry murmurs, blushing the slightest before meeting Niall's eyes.

"You're cute," Niall blurts out and leans in to press a kiss on Harry's soft cheek.

The younger boy blushes even more, shaking his head a bit and throwing the empty soup bowl away. He takes a few sips of water, turning to face Niall who has a gentle smile on his face.

"I like you," is now Harry's turn to blurt out.

"I like you too," Niall instantly says, a grin forming on his face.

Harry's automatic reaction is to lean in and brush his lips against Niall's. He keeps hoping Niall won't get sick, but then again he said earlier he wouldn't mind.

"Can we cuddle?" Niall murmurs against Harry's lips.

They settle down on the bed, Niall resting his head on Harry's chest. Harry closes his eyes, pressing his face on Niall's hair and squeezing him a bit. He thinks it feels surreal being like this, having a hard time understanding that Niall is actually here and they kissed, and Niall likes him, too.

"Harry, what's that?" Niall asks when he notices a small, white flower on Harry's windowsill. Harry opens his eyes and sees Niall pointing at something by the window.

"What, oh that plant?" Harry realises and Niall nods a bit.

"It's a snowdrop. Didn't you know that?" Harry teases and laughs loudly when Niall smacks his stomach. Niall ends up laughing too, pressing his face on Harry's chest.

"I meant, why do you have one here?" Niall asks once he has finished laughing.

"Oh you know, someone once told me it's their favourite flower," Harry playfully answers, smiling happily before placing a kiss on Niall's cheek.

"You're not being serious," Niall comments.

"It brings good memories," Harry truthfully answers.

"You're amazing, did you know that?" Niall's tone changes to more serious and he raises up to look at Harry.

Harry doesn't say a word, only smiles, eyes crinkling from the corners. Niall looks into his eyes for the longest time before leaning in, connecting their lips into a chaste kiss.

"You're too, you know," Harry manages to mumble between the kisses.

 

 

\- -

 

"Hi Gemma," Harry says, brushing some snow off of the gravestone.

"It's me again," he continues, crouching down in front of the grave, pulling a candle out of his pocket and lighting it.

"I don't know why I always say that," he then comments. He carefully places the candle on its regular spot right next to the stone, in the middle of a snow pile. The candle lights up the snow, making it sparkle and Harry smiles, thinking it looks beautiful.

"I have something to tell you," he quietly says, staring at the gold letters on the gravestone which tell his sister's name.

"It's me and Niall's three month anniversary tomorrow," he starts.

"And I think I'm in love with him," he breaths out, enjoying how good it feels to share that with someone, saying the words out loud.

"I also think that, in a way, you brought us together," he adds, carefully wiping some snow off of the snowdrops him and Niall once planted, wondering how the flowers are still alive, raising above a layer of snow.

 


End file.
